Daring Danielle

The World is as you believe it to be, and it changes as you change - Byron Katie
Beginning a Self-Inquiry Practice

You have gone far, Now lets go deep.

“My Work is based in a lived conviction

that any story, no matter how painful,

can be reexamined using the four questions

and transformed from pain to purpose. ”

Moving to California at 20 years old was one of the best decisions in my life! I loved being a part of the blossoming yoga community, engaging in interesting progressive conversations around human rights, equal access, food security and of course – spirituality.

In the years to come, not only did I put myself through college and graduate school but I developed quite the knack for travel. I completed my first yoga teacher training in Montezuma, Costa Rica, taught my first yoga classes at Zen Yoga in San Juan Del Sur, Nicaragua, and deepened my yoga practice through the study of Thai Yoga Massage in Chiang Mai, Thailand. 

 

I voyaged to Dharam Sala, India to engage in the practice of loving -kindness and study the 4 noble truths with the Dalai Lama, followed my ancestral roots back through the Caribbean and into Africa, witnessed the great wildebeest migration on Safari in Kenya and Tanzania, Worked to help reduce the spread of Ebola in Liberia, West Africa and drifted through the Coptic churches of Lalibela, Ethiopia.

I’ve been there.
I’m Danielle and I am passionate about working with people who feel stuck in their lives because I spent the majority of my life stuck in a paralyzing shame cycle!

 

As a child I was ashamed of how poor we were compared to the other children, ashamed that my father didn't want a relationship with me, that my family wasnt better educated, ashamed of the way that I looked, ashamed that I was being sexually abused at home, and ashamed of not having the type of family support I considered normal and necessary to be successful in life.

I was so riddled with shame and guilt that it made it nearly impossible for me to discuss my childhood or familial relationships with my peers. I feared having to answer questions about my family and would often just make up stories to avoid what I always assumed would be an uncomfortable and identity damaging conversation.

I know exactly what it is like to feel like you dont belong.

Facades, armor and boundaries proved to be ineffective in keeping me safe from the cruel, judgemental world of my imagination where no one liked me. Eventually, I was forced to look in the mirror and acknowledge all of the shameful stories I was harboring that made it impossible for me to even like myself.

Every horrible thought I feared others would think of me, were actually just the things I truthfully were thinking about myslef. The time came for me to take ownership of my own thoughts about myself and stop projecting my beliefs onto other people.

The work showed me that no one ever has the power to hurt me.

Through revisiting the experiences that made me feel unlovable, broken, damaged, and abused, I began to take notice of the event that actually took place – and my stories and beliefs about what the event or action meant about me. In my case, it seemed as though the stories I told myself about my self-worth and value in relation to my difficulties was what hurt. I created stories such as,

Since my father did not have a relationship with me, no man will ever love me

Since I was a victim of child molestation, my innoncence was stolen from me and I’ll never be able to have a healthy sex life

 

Since my family was dysfuntional, I’m broken and will never be able to find true success or happiness

The Work was the only practice that allowed me to call BS on most of those beliefs and accept myself enough to share my gifts with the world. That's quite a feat considering I’ve spent most of my life healing the parts of myself I considered broken or trying to make up for all of the things I thought I lacked. It took a complete shift in perspective to acknowledge that my true self could never be broken or bruised and was always enough.

Traveling to distant lands has been a huge part of my self-exploration journey, and yet my most daring adventures have taken place at home on the couch, working through heartbreak, disappointment, and self-doubt. I was beginning to realize how the difficulties I experienced in my past were coloring my world and keeping me stuck in a reality of lack and conflict. I found it was much scarier to sit down with someone I loved and tell them the truth about myself than solo traveling through foreign lands.

 

I could see how quickly my sense of identity shifted in the face of adversity- when a loved one died, during an unexpected breakup or when I was fired from what I thought was a dream job. No amount of meditation or good deeds seemed to be enough to free me from my perpetual victimhood and unhappiness. My dissatisfaction with myself made it impossible to foster healthy relationships. I couldn’t imagine trying to sit down with my mother and tell her the truth about how her choices in men affected my childhood, or explaining to a romantic interest that not only was my father missing from my life, his replacement was physically abusive and emotionally manipulative.

Needless to say, I struggled when it came to my personal relationships. I could easily meet people and make friends but my fear and insecurity kept many of these relationships shallow. I became determined to reset my sails and navigate towards deeper more meaningful relationships. 
 

 

If you are ready to begin your own self-inquiry practice, I can help you.

When I was just starting out in The Work I had a difficult time facilitating myself. I would watch countless Youtube videos of Byron Katie facilitating other people and still could not seem to get through a worksheet. I desperately wanted to experience that shift in perspective that others were having, so I stuck with the process. After attending my first Byron Katie live event I got clarity on the optimal way to complete the worksheet and what to and not to do when facilitating someone else.

I’ve attended Katie’s mental cleanses, her nine-day school and countless retreats and courses with certified facilitators and have developed an approach that works for people who are desperate to get out of their own way and take full ownership of their lives. I now have a process and some steps to help assist you in your journey of incorporating the work into your spiritual practice.

In addition to being a facilitator in The Work, I’m a registered 200-hour yoga teacher, writer and environmental public health professional with both international and domestic disaster experience. My favorite pastimes include writing, gardening, dancing, traveling and daydreaming. I’m a firm believer in the potential of all people to live up to their full potential and create a life that matters

Thanks to the gift of the internet, I can now work with people from any corner of the globe. This is great because it allows us to do the work from a place that feels familiar and safe and allows us to store our conversations to revisit at a later date. In addition to the live calls, I also offer some additional support and resources through email. If you’d like to work with me we can schedule a clarity call where you can learn more about how our facilitation calls will work, I can get a sense of what your needs are and we can determine if we will be a good fit for one another.

What is The Work?

The Work is a transformational Self-Inquiry process used to unravel stressful or harmful beliefs about ones self or the world. This system was created by Byron Katie and consists of simply 4 questions.

Making Friends with Stressful Thoughts

I was introduced to the work by a German woman backpacking through Northern California that I met at some sort of women's gathering. There isn't much that stands out to me about that night except that we were standing around a bonfire and I was talking about things I...

My introduction to the Work

We stood around the bonfire, mostly women, mostly connected through the local yoga studio where a number of us worked or took classes. A foggy chilly night spent throwing small slips of paper bearing the names of past lovers, our good intentions and past hardships that we watched travel up along the clouds of smoke and up towards a benevolent heaven as a humble supplication for continued abundance, good health, loving relationships, travel and infinite new adventures.  W

Tools for the Journey

Everything that you need to begin doing the Work is available for free at www.thework.com.

Judge Your Neighbor Worksheet

One Belief At A Time (Front)

One Belief At a Time (Back)

"Not until we are lost, do we begin to know ourselves". - Henry David Thoreaux

Ready to do The Work?

1. Who Would You Be Without Your Story?

A “story” in this case is being defined as a compilation of thoughts, beliefs, judgments and ideas that shape your perception and experience of the world around you. You’re wise enough to know that you are not your thoughts but that hasn’t stopped them from dictating how you live your life. You’ve tried to mentally replace them with positive affirmations, have tried to quiet or silence them through various meditation techniques and prayers or you’ve tried to theorize them away by reminding yourself that they’re just thoughts and they don’t mean anything.

2. If changing your thoughts was so simple, why havent you been able to adopt a healthier mindset?

I’ll tell you why, the beliefs that make up your current cognitive operating system were not just selected by you by chance and cant be willed or wished away. These stories became embedded in your personality based on a pain experience as a means to protect yourself from further harm. In most cases these are from direct pain experiences but limiting beliefs can also be passed down through social and cultural norms.

3. This work is not for the faint of heart.

In order to actually see real changes in your thinking and your life you will need a full overhaul of each of these particular operating systems. The method I’m offering will require you to mentally revisit areas in your life that you have been trying to forget or have never spoken to about to another individual, and fill in the details on a Judge Your Neighbor worksheet. This will help us get reaquainted with what was happening mentally, physically and emotionally in that moment and explore the thoughts, beliefs and ideas about the world you adopted in that instance.

4. The Blessing is in the Betrayal.

The benefits of doing the work is that it allows you to look closely at the often painful pivot points in your life and discover the lessons that they were there to teach you. As part of our facilitation session, you will walk away with a list of people whom you can make amends and an actionable guide based on your worksheet on what you can do to feel the way you want to feel immediately, this guide is often referred to as your prescription for happiness. Finally, you can transform the bad man, bad thing, or burden in your life into your gift! After our clarity call, you will know exactly how to complete either the Judge your neighbor or the one belief at a time worksheets, how the facilitation process works, where exactly you can find all of Katies free resources and some useful tips for starting your self-inquiry journey.

Hear from previous clients

I love Danielle! She is a wonderful facilitator: Loving, connected, and attentive. As a facilitator and as a person, Danielle is just delightful. I love doing the Work with her! I love the way she holds the space for me and guides me gently when I need it.  I feel very comfortable and free and fully trust her.

I met Danielle at the New Year’s Cleanse in 2015, where I got to witness her on stage with Katie. The session was very moving and I experienced Danielle as authentic, genuine, spontaneous, and vulnerable.
We started doing the Work together regularly in 2017 when she reached out to The Work community for daily partners. We also went to a retreat together (The Work with Grace Bell in Breitenbush, OR) and continued doing the Work afterwards.
It was a joy and an honor to be facilitated by Danielle, and I look forward to more sessions!

-Judith Pfeiffer Judith Pfeiffer

Student

As a facilitator, Danielleis perceptive and supportive–I have gone deep in my work with her. Her Vibrant spirit and embodied qualities of strength, clarity, authenticity, vulnerability, and resilience infuse her work. Its a joy to be facilitated by Danielle!

-Louise Deerfield Louise Deerfield

Student